humor and jokes thread

[liberty belle]

The scene is a dark jungle in Africa. Two tigers are stalking through the brush when the one to the rear reaches out with his tongue and licks the ass of the tiger in front. The startled tiger turns around and says, "Hey! Cut it out, already." The rear tiger says, "Sorry," and they continue.

After about another 5 minutes, the rear tiger again reaches out with his tongue and licks the ass of the tiger in front. The front tiger turns around and cuffs the rear tiger and says, "I said stop it!" The rear tiger says, "Sorry," and they continue.

After about another 5 minutes, the rear tiger once more licks the ass of the tiger in front. The front tiger turns around and asks the rear tiger, "What is it with you, anyway?"

The rear tiger replies, "Well, I just ate an attorney and I'm trying to get the taste out of my mouth!"

[cowboycode]

Subject: Chinese Proverbs
>>
>> Passionate kiss like spider's web, soon leads to undoing of fly.
>> Virginity like bubble, one prick all gone.
>> Man who run in front of car get tired.
>> Man who run behind car get exhausted.
>> Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
>> Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.
>> Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
>> Man with one chopstick go hungry.
>> Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails.
>> Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
>> Baseball is wrong, man with four balls cannot walk.
>> Panties not best thing on earth but next to best thing on earth.
>> War not determine who right, war determine who left.
>> Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.
>> Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
>> It take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill it.
>> Man who drive like hell bound to get there.
>> Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
>> Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.
>> Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.
>> Man who farts in church sits in own pew.

[AyatollahGondola]

Those are pretty good Cowboy